Mouth of Madness

Sooner or later my co worker sam will have to give up her free twenty four hour babysitting service, and bring her baby home. Unfortunately, this means that sam must also give up her cat for a period of time. Now as everyone knows, I am not only the smartest, but also the most kindest person in this city. Don't lie, you know I am. Since I have graciously decided to adopt sam's cat for this period of time, and since I am doing so tonight, I started thinking about my cat jericho. I do not hate cats, but I have never loved them either. I was never devastated over the loss of a cat, like I was over a family member or a good dog. So when my current wife and I started having a serious relationship a few years ago, It was very difficult for her to convince me to let her get a cat from the pound. After many sexual favors were promised (but never delivered), I caved in and told her she could get a cat. I was very upset though by her choice. She picked the one that was hiding in the back of a cage, and had no interest in us what so ever. All the other cats were purring and begging for our attention. I have decided though that her decision to pick that cat was one of the all time greatest decisions. I would put it up there with some other all time great decisions such as, writing the Declaration of Independence and opening the Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise. The pound here in amarillo has an overnight drop off place, where a person can go in and put various animals in various cages. A person could also just walk in and take the animal out, which is what we did. After breaking this cat out from the pound at three in the morning, we took him to my fathers house, which is where I was living at the time. It was at this time that the cat started purring non stop and showed some signs of gratitude for the clemency we granted him, but it is also when we realized we picked a defective cat. Im not kidding when I say defective. The cat could not walk right. His back legs could not stay straight and when he would run he would run almost sideways, His back legs would be right beside his front legs. The fact that he was a retard was not the only reason I was kicking my ass for taking in a damn cat, my wife stole the name I was saving for the next dog I got. Jericho turned out to be a great cat. Jericho was atleast a year old when we got him, and at the time I Just turned 18, so I was still living with my father, who hated cats. Needless to say Jericho spent many of his first two months with us living in my Vehicle. No complaints what so ever. Don't get bitchy now for me leaving a cat in a car all day (it was a ford explorer.... somewhat big) I would sneak him in every day, and all night. Jericho would answer to his name and would just follow me around everywhere. We would not let him outside due to his inability to jump or balance, but when we would go on walks we would let him out and he would stay right next to us, as if he were on a leash. He loved car rides. I could go on and on about what a great cat jericho was. Our rotweiller was not a cat fan either, and he got a hold of jericho and killed him a few months ago. That was the only cat I have ever liked enough to bury. So now I will have sam's cat. This means that whenever I want sam to work for me she will agree or she must fear me feeding the cat to one of my three snakes. Nobody really wants to read about a fucking cat, I know this, but I was bored and had nothing else to write about. Blogging kills time. Also I figured that I could be an asshole and make the asian people, that read my blog while we are working, hungry by talking about cats.....